Heartlites by Krystiahn

Hi, Blog Buddies!

Have U noticed how sexist the marketing media gangs R?
I sure have.
4 Instance:
Y R guys encouraged 2 buy "Hungry Man XXL Dinners" ... but never women?
Maybe I've missed those ads 4 HungryWomen 2 eat XXL Meals? Have U seen them?
Y R only women guilted N2 buying "LeanCuisine" ... but never the guys?

Y R only white women the target N every diet food, diet drug & weight loss machine ad & Nfomercial? .. but never black women?
Is it because our Black Sisters have higher self-esteem & appreciation 4 their bodies & booties than us white women? Possibly & probably true.

Also, have U ladies ever noticed that when we C glam gals N mags, we panic & think: If only I was skinnier, younger, taller or shorter, or blonder or whatever ... then I'd B wonderful!!! Even tho we all know about botox, computer enhancement, etc, .....
Yet guys C a great looking guy N a mag or on TV, & they think "big Deal! He's gay! I'm perfect! Where's my pizza?"

Even the sit-com families... the guys R usually cast 2 B overweight, but they always have skinny wives & tiny kids .... as if they flowed from a different Gene Pool - maybe the gardeners?
Except 4 Roseanne where she hired an actor 2 play her husband who was even bigger than she was ... but still with skinny kids. There's not one wife or child on TV (male or female) who is overweight. Y is that?

Wonder if there shall ever B a sitcom with a heavy woman & a punny guy & kids with weight issues ... even anorexia?

Also, N any town, the teen gal thinks she has 2 B pencil thin with jean waists sitting below their navel .... yet the teen guys R chuncky, showing their blubbery butt crack, underwear & their jeans' waist near their thighs & crotch near their knees. The logic of it all is so screwed up.

Perhaps one day, females will stop thinking they have 2 please an illusion ... & guys will give up the illusion of their perfection.

4 The Record, I'm not a feminist, I'm a Humanist .... because I feel so much simple Humanity is lacking N our everyday society.

What do U think?

Luv & hugs
krystiahn

Dear Blog Buddies,

A few Christmases ago, I felt my days were doomed 2 B lived out N my tiny room N a small local residential motel N town. It was newly bought & trashed by a baffled druggie wherein Water & Electric were frequently cancelled 'cause the guy forgot their bills were a reality. Not a bad drug trip vision.
My tiny alimony checks were never on time so I couldn't rent a real home & my art & writing & memories were stuffed N a local storage unit, the motel phones didn't work, I didn't have a Cell & my computer was N a coma ... great 4 me whose career is based N communication.
I was feasting on instant mashed potatoes as the food stamps ran out, plus the only jobs N town paid no salary as they were (& R) all taken by rich wives who just want something 2 do 2 aleviate boredom.
OK. So as I'm coiled up N bed watching another rerun of "It's A Wonderful Life" while hoping 2 avoid yet another sappy Hallmark TV Moment reminding me that I don't have a family 2 run home 2 embrace ... 2 teen boys who lived N the next door motel room with their drug dealing parents decided 2 have contest: Which one could fart out Jingle Bells the best.
I jumped outta bed & silently screamed: That's It! I want outta this Roach Motel & 2 go home 2 heaven! Now! I need a break!
Being an organized lady, I jumped outta bed & with bleary eyes I began writing my 2-Do list 4 my Departure. Then a BOLT struck!
I recalled living N 3 haunted places during my life. Ohoh!!!
I panicked thinking: if I die here, I do NOT want 2 haunt this dump 4 the next 2 centuries!
But where do I go 2 end/begin it all? & (being a fashioable me) What do I wear???
I thot "Lady Spirits N White" have been highly over done.
I wanted 2 wear red. Perhaps chiffon. A fitted top with a furled shirt, & definitely Manolo red heels.
I felt I positively HAD 2 get my hair & nails done as they'd have 2 last me a looooong time.
Then eternal pantihose & everlasting lip gloss & mascara.
OK! Costume done!
Next: where? Where do I end/begin it all???
Maybe the local beautifully landscaped country club N town?
Nah! 2 many snobs, gossips & golf addicts. Besides the food doesn't smell great enough 2 die 4 (literally).
Next, being a humanitarian, perhaps I should go 2 the local hospital, N my red chiffon, Manolo shoes, all gussied up, & end/begin it all on their doorstep with a note pinned 2 my dress saying: "Take my body parts, please"
Then I thot: 4get it! I don't want 2 haunt a hospital! I hate hospitals! It would B full of sick ghosts N backless gowns all mad 'cause they can't sue their doctors 4 malpractice.
Next? Aha! I'll buy a flight 2 Donald Trump's mansion club N Florida, Regis sure luvs it, & end it there! What better place 2 haunt? I might even meet up with a handsome tuxedo-ed guy ghost & dance the decades away!
OK. Sounds good. Style side taken care of!
Now, 4 my practical side: I must write my will & leave my storage 2 a couple friends. It held over 5,000 paintings, all my writing & sculpture & glam clothes & momentos.
But, I thot: they can't afford the storage fees!!!
Then I thot: Heck! I can't afford the storage fees 4 them either .... plus the red dress, the Manolo shooes, the hair-do, maicure, the flight 2 Florida .... etc.
Realizing I couldn't even afford 2 die N this rich, cheap small town, I crawled back N2 bed watched another rerun of Charlie Brown's Christmas ... & still wanted 2 throttle Lucy 4 being such a cartoon bitch... & silently sang:
All I Want 4 Christmas Is My Next Month's Rent & 4 me 2 have a Reason 2 B Living.
I then prayed 2 awaken & learn Y God still wants me here.
Sure my friends say they need me 4 my laughter, inspiration. creativity, luv & kindness ... but that's sure not a job op N the Help Wanted Columns or on Craigslist.Com.
But I'm still alive N this wacky small town, livin' N a sweet little rental & chattin' with U on the Net thanx 2 my Earth Angels, so I guess there is a reason 4 us all.
Tho, I still don't have a clue as 2 Y I is! (smiles)

MORAL: Even when we De-Earth it's still all about
Location, Location, Location!

2 B Continued

& There U go
krytiahn

Howdy, Heart Lites!

It’s so easy for us humans to complexicate simplicity when we’re bombarded with Earthian madness and media confusion and illusions. Especially in a society that keeps telling us: What’s in your bank account and material stash is more important than what’s in your heart.

It’s often a daily choosing of which attitude I’ll imagine for the day. For me, the best morning booster is to NOT turn on the TV news and be slaughtered with all the local and world problems that exploded while I was sleeping, & I’m not prepared to resolve while still in my jammies.

And I do not look at all the beautiful morning anchors, especially the incredibly divine Diane Sawyer, while I am still rubbing sleep out of my eyes, stumbling in to pee and then nuking a cup of coffee, unless I keep remembering: Diane has already been into hair, make-up and wardrobe for over an hour and getting paid millions to be there on time.

My only Saving Grace for everyday is to capture at least 10 minutes every morning before the world interrupts me with it’s onslaught of frantic nonsense over my nuked coffee ... the best hideout for me is the shower (my cosmic phone booth).

There I chat with my Angels, as in:

“OK, Gang! What are we going to do today? What’s the assignment? Cheer somebody up? Help someone laugh? Call and listen to a friend? Paint a painting? Do the laundry? What’s it all about, Alfie Angels?”

Then I hush up and listen.

After that I start counting my blessings, no matter how small they may seem. Like: “Thank you for the sheets I just slept on, the hot water that trinkled out of the shower, the food I have to feed my cats, the roof over my head, the quality friends who luv me and I luv, the ability to walk and see and sense… the nuked coffee & the wherewithal 2 communicate on my computer.”
It is so easy to take what we have for granted, be it a tramp or a Trump. Each in our own way, if we only view our spiritual assets, we have soooo much to be grateful for!

Like: True friends (tho they may be few but loyal), a roof to harbor our bodies (though it may be a one-roomer and not a mansion) and food though it may be Mac & Cheese and not Wolfgang Puck’s Take Out.

Each in our own way, we need to deal the cards we are dealt… be it Jokers or Aces. Hey! At least we have a Hand 2 Hold N The Game!

Play your cards as if you are the King or Queen of Hearts!

Hullo there,

I casually call myself the Laughter Pastor of The Church of Chuckles as I believe the best sense God gave us is our sense of humor... that's so that our other senses can enjoy themselves.

Besides, Laughter is the best medicine ... it better B because I sure can't afford health insurance.

Actually I do visit the Comedy Central Clinic & C Dr. SNL when available.

U might want 2 check out my book:
"It Ain't Easy Makin' Life Tough... How 2 Laugh At Stuff That Made U Cry"
U can find it via http://aint.krystiahn.com
It's free 2 read 4 now!!!... & if it's meant 2 read, it'll B a breeze! & so it is!

I wish I could recommend chapters 4 U 2 read, but I don't know U yet.
So, on the assumption that U R a nice optimistic person, U might want 2 check out Chap 41 "Imagine", or #17 "Killjoys Are Creative, Too" ... or even #28 2 know more about me... or #1 2 know more about U!

When we connect & U want 2 chat... message me... obviously, I am here!

Plus: If U R artisticly inclined, my art site is www.krystiahn.com